The People in My Head: Susan Seagrave
Susan Seagrave was a very sad girl. She never talked to men much, never said much to anyone, just kept to herself and looked miserable. You see, she was terrified of the powers of her mind. Her father had told her, as a small girl, that she was very very special. She loved her father so much, and believed and trusted him so much, that when strange things would happen around her, she would understand them through what he said. He said she was unique, a very special girl...
Once, long ago, she fell in love. They were at the same school, and hung out together in their lunchbreaks. Neither had many friends, but they had each other. One day she brought him home to meet her father. He seemed to like him and she was so happy and then her boyfriend's head exploded. Her father took the body and hid it away, telling her it was because of her "specialness" that it had happened. She had to learn to control her feelings. He wouldn't say more about it, but that he loved her and he wouldn't tell anyone what happened. No one ever found the body. People talked for a bit, asked a few questions of Susan at school. Rumours spread. Someone claimed they'd bought a lot of things from Myers on approval and were being chased to pay up. Debt collectors were alleged to be hunting them down. Someone said they'd done this in two other states. No one knew how anyone knew this; it was just common knowledge. For the rest of her school days she remained alone.
Soon, it all passed into myth and Susan went to University. She met a nice young law student, a rarity for sure, and they started going out. She was afraid of being happy, so she became withdrawn and evasive. The law student thought she didn't really like him. He started to sleep around and do things to provoke Susan into demonstrating her feelings for him. She kept control of herself though, and became miserable. One day they had a big fight, kissed and made up, and began to be happy with each other.
She brought him home to meet her father. Once more he was happy for his daughter and she was so glad her father liked the law student that she was filled with joy and as she smiled at her boyfriend his head exploded. Her father took the body and told Susan to be more careful. She was special; she had to learn to control her feelings more.
Susan graduated and moved interstate. She got a job at an insurance firm investigating fraudulent claims. Nobody much liked her because she never seemed happy. No one wanted to get involved with someone who was so depressing to be around. She was truly miserable, hanging around in seedy bars drinking, fobbing off sleazy men who tried to pick her up. She became known as an ice queen.
One day, a miserable man sat next to her. He didn't try to pick her up, just drank and ignored her. They sat together in silence at the bar. For no good reason she bought him a drink. Then he bought her one. They started talking. They went home together to her place. The next morning his body was on the floor. His head had exploded. She called her father but he didn't answer his phone. She tried his mobile. He asked what happened and agreed to come over and clean up. It was only a few hours later that he arrived. He took care of the body and told her to be more careful. She was a very special girl and she needed to control herself. Then he left her alone.
Unable to love for fear of exploding heads. It had happened to her mother too. She'd smile at men and their heads would explode all the time. Her father had to keep hiding the bodies, but he never complained. He loved his wife too much for that. They moved states several times to avoid investigation. Her father always said it was her mother's fault for liking too many people, but he never blamed her, just asked her to be more careful who she smiled at. Susan loved her father, and believed everything he said. Even when her mother's head exploded while trying to leave the house. Susan's father told her it was her fault. She had smiled at her mother when she said goodbye.
Happiness is best found at home, he had said. She had hated him for that, at the time, but no matter how much she loved her father, she could never make his head explode.
Once, long ago, she fell in love. They were at the same school, and hung out together in their lunchbreaks. Neither had many friends, but they had each other. One day she brought him home to meet her father. He seemed to like him and she was so happy and then her boyfriend's head exploded. Her father took the body and hid it away, telling her it was because of her "specialness" that it had happened. She had to learn to control her feelings. He wouldn't say more about it, but that he loved her and he wouldn't tell anyone what happened. No one ever found the body. People talked for a bit, asked a few questions of Susan at school. Rumours spread. Someone claimed they'd bought a lot of things from Myers on approval and were being chased to pay up. Debt collectors were alleged to be hunting them down. Someone said they'd done this in two other states. No one knew how anyone knew this; it was just common knowledge. For the rest of her school days she remained alone.
Soon, it all passed into myth and Susan went to University. She met a nice young law student, a rarity for sure, and they started going out. She was afraid of being happy, so she became withdrawn and evasive. The law student thought she didn't really like him. He started to sleep around and do things to provoke Susan into demonstrating her feelings for him. She kept control of herself though, and became miserable. One day they had a big fight, kissed and made up, and began to be happy with each other.
She brought him home to meet her father. Once more he was happy for his daughter and she was so glad her father liked the law student that she was filled with joy and as she smiled at her boyfriend his head exploded. Her father took the body and told Susan to be more careful. She was special; she had to learn to control her feelings more.
Susan graduated and moved interstate. She got a job at an insurance firm investigating fraudulent claims. Nobody much liked her because she never seemed happy. No one wanted to get involved with someone who was so depressing to be around. She was truly miserable, hanging around in seedy bars drinking, fobbing off sleazy men who tried to pick her up. She became known as an ice queen.
One day, a miserable man sat next to her. He didn't try to pick her up, just drank and ignored her. They sat together in silence at the bar. For no good reason she bought him a drink. Then he bought her one. They started talking. They went home together to her place. The next morning his body was on the floor. His head had exploded. She called her father but he didn't answer his phone. She tried his mobile. He asked what happened and agreed to come over and clean up. It was only a few hours later that he arrived. He took care of the body and told her to be more careful. She was a very special girl and she needed to control herself. Then he left her alone.
Unable to love for fear of exploding heads. It had happened to her mother too. She'd smile at men and their heads would explode all the time. Her father had to keep hiding the bodies, but he never complained. He loved his wife too much for that. They moved states several times to avoid investigation. Her father always said it was her mother's fault for liking too many people, but he never blamed her, just asked her to be more careful who she smiled at. Susan loved her father, and believed everything he said. Even when her mother's head exploded while trying to leave the house. Susan's father told her it was her fault. She had smiled at her mother when she said goodbye.
Happiness is best found at home, he had said. She had hated him for that, at the time, but no matter how much she loved her father, she could never make his head explode.
posted by Andrew Lee at 2:57 PM
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